14 February 2007

Living in the Spaces between Things

I'm grateful I live in SoBe cuz i pretty much forgot it was valentine's day ALL DAY LONG. it was only in japanese class that i remembered. it was kinda hard not to, shiga sensei passed out platonic valentine's chocolates that said things like "you're cool" and "i love you. . . as a friend." okay, i made up the second one. i know if i was in chicago, or nyc, i'd be completely inundated with billboards of handsome couples exchanging gifts of whisky, micro-fiber teddies, polar fleece ski vests and menthol cigarettes. i love you, here, smoke a dinner mint will ya?

It's strange being in this place bewteen women, between relationships, bewteen palpitations, between worlds. i don't like it at all. but i think it's really good for me. i used to be a serial monogamist for so long that i'd forgotten what it was like to be bored with myself, or more importantly, to be friends with myself. africa changed all that.

There's a part of me that feels like every day i'm not madly in love, or half-naked and sleeping in fetal position with the woman i love, my body wrapped around hers like a human throw, is somehow a wasted day. that's my romantic sentimentality i guess. but another part of me, knows, that i would NEVER have written this novel if i'd been in a relationship. deprivation is my first ashram and love is my first prayer.

Love and peace to youz. i'm sending you many blessings.

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