1. --prairie schooner, fucker, susan said.
2. --i'm sorrry. I totally forgot about you, the waiter said, do you know what you'd like?
i've always wanted to say this, i confide to v, yeah, i'll take a geisha please.
3. --well, maybe it could work if i met someone on craig's list where everything's anonymous, and we just went to a club in an entirely different city, v said, in reference to going to a sex club.
4. --i'm sorry we didn't talk kpg. i'm a bad friend, i said, right before i stepped on her foot.
--ow, that hurts, she said.
--sorry, i said, you can hurt me back if you want to.
--do you want me to hurt you?" she asked.
--well, not now, i said, 2 feet from k's car, there's like an audience.
5. --i'm gonna crump yo'ass mr. jackson, little shoes said with a snarl. okay, she didn't actually say those words, but i'm kinda charmed when i IMAGINE her saying that. in my mind, she stands up afterwards, and starts CRUMPING IT LIKE THERE'S NO TOMORROW and all we can do is open our mouths and exhale in unison, like we're tasting mint for the first time.